They haven't quite figured out yet that it's love, but I'm pretty sure they both know there's something brewing.
Right now, Boo is living in the family room. And of course, I'm living there too since I'm the pathetic doormat who goes wherever Boo goes. In our relationship, I'm the dog. Boo's bitch, that is.
So Boo's in the family room. And the family room, right now, is a cat's theme park. Kitty's Dominion. Six Boo-Flags. Boo Gardens. The furniture's in place, but there are still some boxes. And, even better, most of the boxes are empty.
Been a cat lately? Empty boxes are like girls whose thong is peeking out from her low rise jeans. You must explore. You have no choice.
So Boo is pretty happy.
Well, I'm not sure happy is exactly the word.
I guess Boo is torn.
Here's the deal:
The entrance to the living room is blocked by boxes. Today I need to buy a baby gate.
The boxes are high enough that Emma can't get in, but low enough that Boo can see out. Boo can glimpse the world outside of the family room. And he can see Princess Emma, of course.
So Boo is safe, but exposed.
And he's handling it really well.
He's not doing his serious hiding thing. He is crouching a bit, but in full view. Not behind a sofa or bookshelf. That's a good sign.
And he's climbing. Climbing and jumping. Climbing and jumping. Climbing and jumping. Just like he loves to do.
And, thank the almighty and powerful God, Boo's peeing and pooping and eating. All in the appropriate places. Oh, thank you Jesus. Thank you Allah.
Oh, I should thank the Pope too. Not sure whether he's a Paul or a John, but whoever he is, I thank him too.
So Boo's good.
As long as he's safe in his family room.
Crouching, climbing, jumping, peeing, pooping and eating.
While Emma's been in her room this morning - against her doggy will, I should add - I tried bringing Boo into the living room to hang out.
Boo clung to me while I carried him in. Then he tried to get down, which I took as a good sign. A sign of interest in the room. And interest in being out of the family room.
Boo was interested, all right. Completely interested in getting back to his safe place. He quietly walked back to the family room and took his position. Next to the desk but slightly behind the little green bench. Half hidden, half visible. Boo's favorite.
At least he didn't run. That's a good sign, right?
Emma, meanwhile, is crying. And whining. Incessantly.
Emma wants Boo bad. And I don't think she wants to eat Boo or rip him to shreds. I think she just wants to be near Boo. And smell Boo. Oh, man, to just smell Boo would be heaven.
Poor Emma.
You can look, but you can't smell.
So Emma's whining and Boo's observing. Emma stands near the boxes, looking over with desire while Boo crouches looking out at her with that strange mix of curiousity and fear.
They're eye flirting. Just basically eye flirting.
And clearlyfalling in love.
You know, I think I'm onto something here.
Right before my eyes, I'm watching love develop. It's kind of like West Side Story. They shouldn't be together, but they want to be together. Romeo and Juliet. Prince Charles and Camilla. Ben and Gwyneth. Ross and Rachel.
Or maybe that's Rachel and Joey now. I haven't been watching.
Maybe that's the way it should go.
So from now on, no more touching or kissing or sitting together.
From now on, my dates will be conducted from across the room.
"Let's meet at Starbucks."
"Okay."
"I'll be sitting closest to where that barista guy's making fancy girlie drinks."
"Alright. Then I'll sit on the other side near the bathroom."
"Sounds great! See you there!"
"Yeah, see ya, ha ha ha."
You know, if that's how it should be, then I'm TOTALLY ready to date again.
Man, just go to Starbucks, take my computer or something to read, hang out, drink coffee and eye flirt with a guy who's sitting far away?
I can TOTALLY do that.
And you know what? I bet I'd be really good at it.
I'd have to clean my contacts so I can see distance, of course.
And I should probably figure out how to put on eye make up so I look alert and awake from afar.
But I can SO do this.
So far, I've wanted to date.
I do want to meet someone who will love me and kiss me and look at my ass inappropriately.
I really do want to meet someone to eat cereal with and give foot rubs to. Oops. I meant "someone with whom to eat cereal and to whom to give footrubs....to.
You get the point.
The thing is I do. I really do.
But man, that dating thing?
It's horrible.
It's horrible having to sit and talk to somebody and get to know them when you'd really rather just be hanging out.
Yeah. The problem with dating is the fact that you can't do it alone.
But in distance dating, I could do it alone.
Just me. Sitting alone. In a comfortable chair at a comfortable table at a really good Starbucks.
Eye flirting with someone across the room.
Someone who won't make me sit there and talk and be interesting...or interested.
Someone who won't make me obsess over whether or not I said thank you when it was over.
If Boo can do it so well, then I'm fit for the task also.
So, if you're still interested in dating, let me know. I'm ready again. We can go to dinner or the movies or for coffee or drinks. I'm up for anything.
Just tell me when's good. And what time. And where you'll be sitting so I can look over occasionally with wide eyes and a pouty mouth.
And, if all goes well, maybe, quite possibly, at some point, we'll move the boxes so we can smell each other.