Well, I should have known that dating again couldn't be all fun and games.
But, it was definitely fun at first.
In fact, shortly after I started dating again recently, I had this idea that everyone should date a little every couple of years - regardless of their status. For instance, let's say you're in a relationship - a committed love relationship. Every couple of years, just for the health of the relationship, each partner dates other people for a couple of weeks.
Now, I'm not suggesting that the parties to the relationship engage in sex with strangers or anything equally dangerous. I'm just saying that a couple of weeks active dating might actually benefit the participants and, in turn, benefit the relationship overall.
Speaking just for myself, of course, dating was great.
At first.
It was great, after a bunch of years with the same person, to get different types of attention from other people.
Let's say, for instance, that you live with a guy who's big time into butts. Or legs. Or ankles. Or whatever the body part of choice is.
Going out with someone who's fascinated with your shoulders or breasts or hair or any different body part is just totally fun. It's like you're J Lo all of a sudden. Just all amazing and hot and wild in totally new and different ways.
And then, of course, there's the food.
You've got to admit that when you're with someone for a while, you tend to fall into certain food routines. Even if you enjoy something different every once in a while, you basically end up frequenting the same places. It's not that it's a bad thing. it's just what it is.
But when you start dating, you get to experience someone else's favorite restaurant. You get to go somewhere else and order something else. You even get to eat slowly without fear that putting down your fork will signal your dinner partner to swoop in and finish your dinner. Food is just different and fun with someone else. Especially when they grab the bill instead of asking if you have any cash on you.
And, of course, there's the kissing.
Need I really get pornographic here?
Let's just say that kissing someone new is fun. It just is.
So anyway, dating can be highly enjoyable. At first.
Unfortunately, I fear that there does come a point when the inevitable shitty thing happens.
I suppose it could be anything.
And I am just thankful that in my history of dating I've only experienced a couple of hundred minor shitty things. Relative misdemeanors. Although, I've heard that much worse things can happen than those I've experienced.
So, my recent shitty dating thing in my newly single life happened just last week.
My date died.
It's pretty sad too since things seemed to be going pretty well.
We had engaged in a relatively long courtship. Many weeks of friendship and intellectual teasing before there was an actual official date.
And then we had the first date and it went just swimmingly. We meshed, we bonded, we blended, we merged. We did whatever people do when they click. All was well.
So we had more dates. And more good times.
And, I should say, we kissed. And the kissing was good.
And then he died.
I know he died because, after what would come to be our last date, I never heard from him again.
And there's just no other explanation in the world for why I wouldn't have heard from him. Right?
Yeah, I know...you think he lost interest.
NO! Immediately after what would come to be our last date, he sent a confirmation email. An email full of poetry and love type stuff and ponderings of future mergers. I think he even included a deep quote.
There is just SO no way he lost interest.
So what, maybe he got busy?
No. No such thing as busy when you've found someone willing to kiss you.
Maybe he found someone better than me?
No. Not possible.
So clearly he's dead. And it really is sad. Because I think I may have left something at his house and I feel like it might be rude of me to collect from his estate when I didn't even go to his funeral.
You know, I had a friend whose dates used to die too.
She'd go out on a few dates and have a really great time and then they'd disappear.
But she had really bad karma. A LOT of her dates died. Man, you didn't want to go out with her. The odds were just too high. Good dinner, good wine, maybe cop a feel and then you're gone. Bad last date.
But I think I'll limit myself to one dead date.
Because I may not know a lot about men, but I do know that I prefer them alive.