Sometimes life is simple. And sometimes life is just so complex.
Or maybe it's that life is always simple and yet we, being humans, have a need to complicate matters.
This year's been a mix of everything - some good, some not so good, some stuff that just falls in the middle. And it's been a year defined by an ongoing personal campaign to simplify.
Simplifying was a path I had already started down. But as my life actually became more simple, the surrounding presence of complicators became more disruptive.
And so, gone are the complicators. At least most of them. At least for now.
I suspect that having complicators in your life is kind of like having ants. Just when you think you've eliminated all possibilities of ants returning, you see three of them.
Ants and complicators are probably just a part of life. And we probably just need to spend some energy trying to fend off both.
Assuming we don't like them, that is.
I'd guess it's difficult to find anybody who prefers having ants around. But although most folks say they like to keep life simple, I truly believe that many - if not most - people are kinda more comfortable when life's unnecessarily complicated. I think complication provides the distraction many people need from the rawness of actual daily life.
But for the time being, my life's fairly free of complicators. To the extent possible, considering, of course, that I still have friends, colleagues, neighbors, family and Starbucks clerks.
But, to the extent possible, no more individuals who make problems where there aren't problems. No more individuals who enjoy the process of proliferation more than they enjoy peace and quiet. And definitely no more bubblers.
Now complicators and bubblers aren't the same.
Complicators are the folks who take the most simple of statements or actions or concepts or events and create a drama. And complicators ask lots of questions. Because to a complicator, it's apparently inconceivable that something could be as simple as it sounds.
But you know what?
Sometimes, if not most of the time, things are exactly as simple as they sound. Sometimes, in fact, things are probably even more simple than they sound.
Now maybe the complicator doesn't want things to be so simple. Maybe the complicator likes things when they're more complex. Maybe the complicator needs for things to be more involved than they are.
If I had to propose a complicator's theory, I'd suggest that complicating is tied to either self-importance or avoidance.
Then again, I suppose everything comes down to either self-importance or avoidance, right?
We apparently need to feel that we're important enough to merit lots of discussion and planning and strategizing and details. Because if matters were really simple, wouldn't that diminish the need for our very important skills and exceptional brilliance and insight and perspective and input? Could it possibly be that life's matters can really and truly proceed without our critical touch?
Personally, I believe the answer to that question is yes.
But I suspect most folks believe their personal touch in matters both foreign and familiar is critical.
God bless them. Because the more those folks are involved in every little thing, the better I feel about disengaging and getting on with my business.
And of course there's avoidance.
We need to avoid, because...well, isn't it obvious? Who wants to deal straight on with the really tough issues when they can instead focus on the irrelevant details of other unimportant stuff?
Pretty basic analysis.
But bubblers? Bubblers are different.
Bubblers are initially complicators, but then they opt for the increasingly proliferating mode instead of just continuing to complicate.
It's a subtle difference, but a difference nonetheless.
The bubblers are conductors, not actors.
The bubblers do just enough - or don't do enough - to ensure that matters continue to complicate.
The bubblers seem to believe that matters were complicated to begin with and the bubblers don't see how their actions and inactions contribute to the expansion of the complications.
Even worse, the bubblers tend to claim absolution of all sorts.
"Things just got worse."
I met someone recently who disavowed all connection to complicating or bubbling. He claimed absolute simplicity.
He said nobody could meet his level of simple.
And he said that he hated bad. So I took him for good.
But he never said that he revered good.
And then he said that 'do no harm' is an acceptable standard.
And I realized a very important thing: you can eliminate useless or harmful complexity without becoming so simple that you impart nothing.
You can choose peace and good and quiet without foregoing the imposition of positive influence where the imposition's helpful and beneficial.
Living simple doesn't mean living in isolation. Living simple isn't just the avoidance of experiencing, creating or contributing to bad things. It's not just the elimination of the uselessly complex.
If living simple were really that simple, it wouldn't be a state so difficult to maintain.
He said "I believe in do no harm"
And for the first time, I didn't blink when I asked whether doing no harm isn't a fairly low standard.